How my first book lied to 30 people

My first book, The Art of Being Human: What It Means to Be, has sold 30 copies.

5 units in October.

8 units in November.

16 units in December.

2 units so far in January.

Oops, that’s 31. This post is actually about how my first book lied to 31 people.

My book accidentally published one month earlier than intended, on October 12, 2016. I originally meant to release it on November 11, 2016.

I was on CreateSpace (Amazon’s self-publishing platform), experimenting with the upload and review process for the first time.

I thought I could upload and approve everything and then set up pre-orders for my book, which would be released on a future date (11/11).

Then suddenly, I realized my book was for sale. This gave me butterflies, much like in seventh grade when a girl I liked caressed my arm.

So, I figured OK. Published a month early. I can go with that. No problemo.

A few close friends instantly bought the first four copies. Ian, Kim, Jordan, and Dad. You all rock.

Unfortunately, those first four copies not only tell lies (which I’ll get to in a minute), but are riddled with an incomprehensible number of typos. I about melted into the floor when I realized how flawed the book was.

It’s especially weird, because 80%+ of the content was written in academia and was at one point perfect. Most of the source essays only existed on paper, so I transcribed and revised them to set up the book.

And did a horrible job. Ian, Kim, Jordan, and Dad, sorry about that.

OK, so I quickly revised and republished as quickly as I could. I believe there are only four copies out there with that minefield of errors.

But all 31 copies lie, right on the title page. Twice…

At the time of publication, I thought andrewlovehicks.com was going to be my long-term online home. I was building a blog there on a platform called Wix. Over time, I realized that Wix was not for me. It makes strides in creating a user-friendly interface at the expense of robust features and flexible depth. I’d rather have the headache and depth, than the cakewalk of proprietary shallowness.

I feel like that last sentence may be a solid metaphor for my whole life. Anyway…

I planned on just switching andrewlovehicks.com over to a new registrar. But then one night I got it in my head, the perfect domain name. andreweffinghicks.com. It just seems right. I’ve earned that domain name. Through 35 years of being me. Being Andrew effing Hicks.

But andrewlovehicks.com is on the title page of the book.

And so is fireandink.com, the also-defunct website of my visionary cover artist, Epiphany Soot.

Two lies for the price of one.

I spent the last month or so, attempting to transfer andrewlovehicks.com to my new host, A2 (which I highly recommend so far). Then I was going to set up forwarding. So if one of those first 31 people go to andrewlovehicks.com it would redirect them here to my new site.

There have been a number of complications on the Wix end, which actually ended up being my fault (kinda; I had a mix up with their questionably-designed domain management interface).

I really wanted to show those first 31 people that they matter to me. I haven’t overlooked them. But after much deliberation, I’ve decided to let it go…

I do not really want to pay for two domain names right now, anyway. It’s not that I’m cheap. It’s that I’m broke. There’s a difference…

Today, I uploaded a new version of The Art of Being Human. One that tells no lies.

If you are one of the 31 people with the bogus links on the title page, feel free to let me know.

Of course, you may have difficulty, well, finding my actual site, so I’ll post this in other places you may read it as well.

Just send me a message (through my contact form, Facebook messenger, andrewlovehicks@gmail.com, whatever) and basically say, “You lied to me.” Then tell me three things you love about yourself. And I’ll put you on a list to receive a free autographed paperback copy of my next book Overcoming Financial Failure: A Peace Treaty with the System. The paperback version will be published by the end of the month (January, 2017).

Just my way of saying sorry, and you matter to me.

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